Category Archives: Breakfast

Whadda Ya Mean You Don’t Like Oatmeal??!!

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Your mother made you oatmeal when you were a kid didn’t she? It was the consistency of school paste and the flavor was probably similar too with the school paste maybe a touch ahead in the running for flavor. She may have thrown a spoonful of white sugar on it, a pat of salty greasy margarine and maybe a bit of milk. So what you ended up with was a pile of gluey oatmeal covered in overly sweet cold milk with a strange salty greasy edge to it. Oh yeah buddy… yum city. Point being though that all of the above is why you have convinced yourself that oatmeal is evil. Right up there with cod liver oil, those chewable vitamins shaped like Fred Flintstone that tasted like you were sucking on a mud covered penny and…well… liver. On an off note (imagine that… off notes from me.) was anyone else freaked out chowing down on Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble? I always felt guilty but never as bad as when I ate Dino. That just seemed so wrong. Poor Dino…. all chewed up. I fully expected to turn on the TV for my afternoon Flintstone fix and find a Public Service Announcement saying “Janet, there is no more Flintstones. Wilma and Betty are now widows weeping into their stone pillows at night and Pebbles and Bam Bam are going to grow up to be fatherless gang members who rob old ladies at stone point and torment Velociraptors for fun. Why you ask? BECAUSE…YOU…ATE….FRED…AND BARNEY…. YOU EVIL….GIRL!!!!!!!!!

I’m weird. I love oatmeal. But the above was pretty much my childhood experience of it just as I know it was for many of you. Our mothers generations (except for those of you who are young enough to be MY kids… I make darned awesome oatmeal 😛 ) made oatmeal as a source of nutrition and warmth not for yum factor. And oatmeal IN things can be pretty awesome too. Like pie. Back in the day when people didn’t sit on their butts all day in front of computers (not that I know anything about that cough cough), food history tells us that pie for breakfast was fairly common. It was filling, a good energy source and warmed you up if eaten hot (because cold things don’t warm you up in case you were wondering that). Oatmeal pie was a good breakfast dish. Buttttt….. being the humans we are, things have to change. Including oatmeal pie. This one here isn’t just an oatmeal custard in a crust. It has dark brown sugar, maple and butterscotch chips, though if you don’t like them, feel free to omit those. I will only cry for a little while. This makes two pies so feel free to cut this in half. This is loosely adapted from a pie I saw on Taste Of Home. Feel free to eat this for breakfast. It has oatmeal after all.

Butterscotch Oatmeal Maple Pie

  • 2 9 inch pie shells (I used the frozen Marie Callander ones; they’re actually pretty good & I was too lazy to make a pie shell)
  • 8 large eggs
  • 1 cup dark brown sugar
  • 3/4 cup white sugar
  • Scant 1/2 cup all purpose flour
  • 2 teaspoons cinnamon (optional. You can still try this Ann 😛 )
  • 1 3/4 cups oats
  • 3/4 cup dark corn syrup
  • 3/4 cup light corn syrup
  • 1 cup pure maple syrup
  • 1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted
  • 2 tablespoons vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon imitation maple flavoring (I used McCormick Brand)
  • 1 11 ounce bag butterscotch chips
  1. Preheat oven to 350. Line your middle oven shelf with foil just in case of drips.
  2. In a large bowl, combine eggs, flour, sugars and cinnamon.
  3. Stir in the oatmeal, butter, syrups (all 3) and extracts.
  4. Stir in the butterscotch chips
  5. Divide evenly between pie shells
  6. Bake for approximately 60 to 70 minutes for two pies or until it is nicely browned and the center is just barely set. There should be a slight jiggle but no liquidy look. One pie won’t take as long to cook so if you cut the recipe in half, start checking after 40 minutes. If you are unsure of doneness, stick a butter knife in the center. if it comes out almost clean, with a little bit of filling on it, it’s done. If it comes out with drippy liquid on it, it’s …well… not.
  7. Let sit for at least an hour or two before trying to cut this. It is similar to Pecan pie in that if you cut it too soon, you’ll have a oozing mess all over. It needs to finish setting up as it cools. The texture is also similar to pecan pie but w/out the pecans. 😛
  8. Serve this with vanilla ice cream or sitting in a puddle of warmed cream. It’s very rich and quite sweet so cut small pieces. Trust me on this.

Y’all Come Back Now Ya Hear?

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If you’re reading my blog, chances are you’ve watched a show or two or five hundred on The Food Network at some time or another. Chances also are that you have very strong opinions on the hosts of those TV shows. Like Rachael Ray. She drives me batty. If I hear her say EVOO one more time instead of just saying extra virgin olive oil, I am going to reach through the screen and knock her upside the head with her garbage bowl. What’s with that bowl anyway? She tries to tell us that it’s a time saver. Ummmm…. how? I mean, really, how hard is it to walk to the trash can (that she prolly has right under a counter anyway) and toss some stuff in there as opposed to making more dirty dishes? And that thing that comes between two slices of bread? It’s a sandwich dammit, a sandwich! Not a freaking “sammy”!! Ok, sorry, I’m calm now.

Then there are the Neelys. All I have to say is get a room. You’re a cute couple but get a room. K? Thanks.

I am so not even giving an opinion on Sandra Lee. Kwanzaa Cake. Look it up on Youtube. That’s enough said right there.

But the queen of Food TV will always be Paula Deen. Love her or hate her, she reigns supreme there. Personally, I have mixed emotions when it comes to her. On the one hand, I love the majority of the food she makes. I mean, she uses ample amounts of butter, sugar and cream. Is there something in that NOT to love? But on the other hand it’s like I said. Mixed emotions. She seems so sweet and country and like you’d love to sit down with her and have a cup of coffee (not like Sandra Lee where you’d need a bottle of Vodka… and then a drink for yourself too) with her and gossip. By the same token, you would want to make sure your husband was locked up in a nunnery (heh. The mental image of my husband in a habit is pretty cool. Yeah; I need to get out more.) because Lord knows that if there is a male around, Miss Paula will be hitting on him. I swear, that woman makes Tiger Woods look virginal. Plus, I have lived in the south for well over 20 years now and I have never… I mean never, heard anyone use the word Y’all as often as she does or drawl quite as deeply unless they were trying out for a remake of Gone With The Wind.

But…like I said, her food is amazing if you like fat and calories. And you know you do. Quit shaking your head no and telling yourself that yes, you really DO prefer Tofu over heavily buttered biscuits smothered in jam. No one believes you. Since we both know that you want the biscuits, I’m here to supply you with some biscuit love, southern style. These are one of Miss Deens recipes and they are quite yummy. Cornmeal biscuits with a blackberry butter. Next time however, as much as I adore Blackberry jam (it’s rather a jam addiction of mine) I want to try making an Apricot Honey butter too. Mmmmm….

CORNMEAL BISCUITS WITH BLACKBERRY BUTTER

Blackberry Butter-

  1. 6 tablespoons butter, softened
  2. 2 tablespoons blackberry jam (I may have used more…just maybe 😀 )
  3. 1 teaspoon grated lime zest (don’t omit this; it makes the flavor of this spread)

Biscuits-

  1. 1 1/3 cups all purpose flour
  2. 2/3 cup cornmeal
  3. 1 tablespoon sugar
  4. 2 1/4 teaspoons baking powder
  5. 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
  6. 1/4 teaspoon salt
  7. 8 tablespoons (one stick) butter, chilled
  8. 3/4 cup sour cream
  • Preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Lightly grease a baking sheet.
  • To make the blackberry butter, mix together the softened butter, jam and lime zest. Stir.
  • To make the biscuits,in a large bowl mix together the flour, cornmeal, sugar, salt, baking powder and baking soda.
  • With a pastry cutter or fork cut in the butter until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Mix in the sour cream until the mixture comes together into a ball. I started with a large spoon but ended up just using my hands to finish so that I could get all the flour mixture hiding in the corners of the bowl.
  • Turn the dough out onto a lightly floured surface and pat to a 3/4 inch thickness. Cut with a 3 inch biscuit cutter. Re-pat the scraps (be gentle with the re rolled scraps. They get tough if handled too much) and roll out and cut.
  • Put on the baking sheet and cook until light golden broth, about 15 to 18 minutes depending on your oven. Do NOT over bake unless you like really crispy hard edged biscuits.
  • Serve these steaming hot with the blackberry butter.

 

 

You mean… This is GOOD For Me? Awwww- No Fair!

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That’s pretty much the reaction I used to get from my kids when they were little and I would serve this. But then again, I have a knack for taking a perfectly healthy food and while keeping the health benefits, also injecting a healthy dose of decadence, fat and calories into it 😀

I have always loved oatmeal anyway, even when it is only adorned with a bit of sugar and some milk which is how I ate it as a kid. But make it this way and call it “Pie Lovers Oatmeal” and you won’t have a problem getting even the most zealous oatmeal haters to love it. Of course, once you serve this, you can forget ever being able to serve plain old oatmeal again but I’ll leave those little issues up to you to solve. I’m just here to cook 😛

You can also make this with other dried fruits. I use apples, raisins and cherries because it’s what I like best. But feel free to sub your favorite; this is pretty flexible in that sense. Dried Peaches are pretty good in it too.

PIE LOVERS OATMEAL

  1. 2 3/4 cup rolled oats (if you want to use steel cut oats, follow the directions for amount of oats and water for three servings but this won’t be creamy. It will be chewier and denser)
  2. 1 1/2 cups water
  3. 2 cups mixed dried fruits (I used 1 cup apples, and half a cup each dried cherries and raisins)
  4. 1/3 cup dark brown sugar
  5. 1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon
  6. 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • Cook the oats according to package directions, but with the simple addition of adding the fruits, brown sugar, vanilla and cinnamon with the oats and water.
  • Garnish with milk or cream (not that *I* would use unhealthy cream. I only suggest it for those of you who don’t have respect for your arteries *cough cough*) and butter.
  • Now wasn’t that easy?
  • Now eat it and convince yourself that you are eating something extremely healthy.
  • In reality, it IS pretty healthy, what with the fruits and the oats.
  • Makes two to three healthy sized servings