Category Archives: Christmas

It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas??? Somewhere.

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Peppermint Bark Chocolate Chip Cookies

But that somewhere is so not here in Kentucky. We have, thus far, been having an annoyingly mild holiday season. Thanksgiving day it was close to 60 degrees. Today, as I baked Christmas cookies, it got up OVER 60. Tomorrow, which according to my calendar is supposed to be December 3rd, is supposed to be almost 70 degrees. W…T….H…??? At this rate, Santa is going to be coming here by surf board. Ok, I live in a landlocked state… maybe convertible would be better. Whatever. You get my point. It’s too darn warm for December! I want snow! I want a reason to light a fire! I want to have a reason to complain about being cold!

You all have my permission to remind me of this post when I’m whining about being cold, by the way.

Anyway, I’ve started my yearly Christmas cookie baking. Ever since my now grown and married kids were little, that has meant that I make approximately 352 dozen cookies. The kids aren’t allowed any until Christmas day (well, Christmas eve nowadays) whereupon we all eat cookies until we are ill and then I spend the next week or so foisting them off on unsuspecting strangers. “Hi… I don’t know you and I’m sorry to interrupt you while the paramedics are wheeling you into the ER gushing blood from several arteries but here… have 3 dozen gingersnaps. You’ll love them after you recover from surgery!”

I remember the year I was working about 70 hours a week as an assistant banquet manager for a hotel. Baking became an….interesting…proposition. I had one day off before Christmas. I used that day and made FIFTEEN different types of cookies so as to not disappoint my kids. Yes, yes I AM insane… why do you ask?

Ahhhh, good times… good times. Or something like that.

Today I made my version of Peppermint Bark in a cookie. I swear… I love that stuff. So putting the flavors in a cookie was a natural extension. I know I could have bought those pre crushed bags of the Ghirardelli’s peppermint bark but what would be the fun in THAT? Twas much more interesting to use all the separate components and do it that way. PLUS, the added bonus is that you get far more chocolate in it my way.

So go buy the ingredients. Unless of course you’re like me and always have somewhere in the vicinity of 1200 bags of different baking chips in the house at any given time. Then go hunt through them and get what you need. These are a little bit chewy, a little bit rock and roll. Sorry; I was channeling Donny Osmond. These are a bit chewy, a bit gooey from the chocolate and then you have those awesome crispy bites when you get some of the crushed candy canes. Bottom line? These are oh so yummy!

One thing? Line your cookie sheets with a silicone mat. Trust me. The candy leaks and prying melted candy cane off a cookie sheet is a pain in the arse. This makes a large batch of cookies. The dough freezes well so you could make your dough now and then freeze it, thaw it, pop it into the oven a bit closer to Christmas.

Peppermint Bark Chocolate Chip Cookies

  • 4 1/2 cups flour
  • 2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 cups unsalted butter, room temp
  • 1 1/2 cups firmly packed brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 2 small (3.4 ounces) boxes instant vanilla pudding mix (I actually used one French vanilla and one cheesecake flavored)
  • 4 eggs
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons peppermint extract
  • 1 bag dark chocolate chips
  • 1 bag white chocolate chips
  • 16 regular sized candy canes, crushed (the kind that come in boxes of 12) (also, crush in a bag. Using the food processor causes them to get just hot enough to get sticky and lump up)
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line your cookie sheet(s) with a silicone mat.
  2. In a bowl, mix together the flour, salt and baking soda.
  3. In a large bowl, combine the butter and sugars. Cream until light and fluffy(ish)
  4. Beat in the pudding mixes, then the eggs, vanilla and peppermint extract.
  5. Using a wooden spoon, mix in the flour mixture.
  6. Pour in the chocolate chips, white chips and crushed candy canes. Mix well. Cuss me out cause your arms are getting really tired about now.
  7. Drop the cookie dough by spoonfuls onto the prepared sheet(s).
  8. Bake for about 12 minutes or until they are a light golden brown. If you prefer your cookies crispier, give them about another minute or 2 in the oven.
  9. Let cool on a wire rack, then eat them until you feel ill. Thank me later.

 

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I Actually Voluntarily Used Hazelnut

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Hazelnut Chocolate Chip Blondies-
Slightly chewy, definitely chocolatey and with a hint of hazelnut flavor.

Wow. Three days in a row blogging. I may just get back to my old habits if I keep this up. Hopefully, I can do it without gaining back any of the weight I’ve lost. That’s been the main reason I stopped blogging as much. fear can be a great motivator against doing certain things lol.

I am pretty sure I’ve mentioned before that I am not a big fan of hazelnuts or anything hazelnut flavored. Usually, that is. I DID try Nutella and ended up liking it though it’s not as regular a part of my snacking as I know it is for many foodies. I have the feeling that there are some bloggers who regularly bathe in Nutella hehe.

Reason being, during my first marriage, I was blessed enough to get to live in Mannheim Germany for 3 years. It’s still a place I remember fondly and miss. I even still have dreams about it… the Volksfests, the Christkindlmarkts during November and December; the smell of spiced wine always takes me right back there… the Konditoreien (you haven’t had good pastries until you get them at a German bakery) and never forgotten, the candy shops. Oh.My.God… German candy is amazingly good. I still reminiscence over a blackberry truffle that has remained unmatched in my memory. The fly in this ointment however is that a LOT of the candies produced in Europe use hazelnut as a flavoring. And when I say lots, I mean L…O…T…S. So I got pretty burnt out on hazelnut anything. I think unless you’re a major fanatic about it in the first place, it’s easy to get tired of it.

I have to admit however that these blondies turned out quite well. I used a Martha Stewart blondie recipe. All I changed was to make the recipe 50% bigger to be able to use a 9×9 inch pan rather than an 8 inch and I added some hazelnut liquor. Believe it or not, next time I think I will add MORE hazelnut liquor (or buy some of this hazelnut flavoring from King Arthur so as to not add too much liquid to the batter. I was actually, for some strange reason, looking forward to the flavor. Probably just so that I could whine over how badly the blondie taste was messed up by the hazelnut taste but you never heard me admit that.

The nutty flavor mixed with the dark chocolate and the walnuts (yes, walnuts; I wasn’t willing to go THAT far with the hazelnut idea nor was I in the mood to shell 9 bazillion of the bitty nuts. I’m lazy. Sue me. YOU however are more than welcome to use hazelnuts instead) was quite good. The blondies themselves were slightly chewy, not really cakey at all which I liked. All in all, I’m rather tickled with this mutant blondie and will be making it again. Now to figure out what to do with the rest of a large bottle of hazelnut liquor.

I’m giving the recipe for the 8 inch pan here. I you don’t have a decent 8 inch pan (mine are rusted old pieces of poop) but have a 9 inch one, just make the recipe 50% bigger. These would work well on your Christmas cookie tray. They’re a pretty looking bar.

Chocolate Chip Hazelnut Blondies

  • 1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened
  • 1/2 cup brown sugar
  • 1/3 cup sugar
  • 1 egg
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 3 tablespoons hazelnut liquor (or one teaspoon hazelnut flavoring)
  • 1 cup flour
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1 12 ounce bag of chocolate chips
  • 1 cup chopped hazelnuts (or walnuts or pecans or cashews if that floats your boat)
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter an 8 inch square pan and line with parchment paper, leaving an overhang. Butter the paper.
  2. In a large bowl, combine the butter and the sugar; mix well.
  3. Whisk in the egg, vanilla and hazelnut liquor (or flavoring)
  4. Add the flour and salt and mix JUST until blended. Gently fold in all but about 1/2 cup of the chocolate chips and about 2/3’s of the nuts.
  5. Spoon batter into the prepared pan. Smooth the top then sprinkle on the rest of the chocolate chips and the nuts.
  6. Bake at 350 degrees until golden brown and a wooden skewer comes out clean, about 40 minutes. Let cool in pan on wire rack until cool, then use the parchment paper to lift the blondies out and cut them into squares.
  7. Eat. Drool. Eat more. Try not to drool more; people will laugh.

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Leftovers? What Leftovers?

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Sweet Potato Bread- mashed sweet potatoes, wonderful warm spices, lots of flavor

My household is, in very many ways, a fairly typical American household. In most respects, I’m fine with that; proud of it as a matter of fact. One way I’m not so thrilled however is in the amount of food we tend to waste. Fruits and veggies that go bad before we get to them, meat that gets freezer burned, leftovers that everyone gets sick of and end up getting tossed. It annoys the poop out of me. Which is why, after a day like Thanksgiving, when there are enough leftovers in most families to feed a small country, I like to try to do something with what I can. Something other than serving Russ and the boys turkey and the fixings for yet. One.More.Meal.

Being me however, what really happens is that they get turkey and all the fixings for just one. more. meal. And they cry and gnash their teeth and threaten to move into the neighbors house (and if you’ve seen me talk about my psychotic neighbor, you know the desperation THAT entails). So I placate them. I take the good stuff and recycle it into…well… other good stuff.

There’s a lot you can do with leftover cranberry sauce. A lot you can do with leftover sweet potato casserole. Yep, even with the kind that has 36 cups of brown sugar in it, as well as 8 sticks of butter and 5 bags of mini marshmallows. Trust me. Being the mom of six kids, with the typical “omg, our monthly bills cost HOW much?!” life, I’ve learned to create some yummy stuff out of other stuff that was also yummy once upon a time but that now just causes people to cry when they see it. Mind you, we are also a “normal” American family in that we still spend too much on groceries and still waste too much, but I like to delude myself into thinking that I have a handle on it and am getting better at it. Delusion is also an American way of life hehe.

This bread is a good way to get rid of those last few scoops of sweet potatoes. Don’t bother trying to scrape off the marshmallows (or nuts if you use them) or whatever else is in there. Just use it all. You’ll get a nice moist flavorful bread and a “woohoo!” feeling when you know that you don’t have to nuke the stuff for yet another meal.

Sweet Potato Bread

A nice golden loaf of bread flecked with bits of sweet potato. This will fill your home with the smells of the holiday season as it bakes. Moist and tender, this is great spread with butter or some pumpkin butter if you have it.

  • 1 cup oil
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1 cup brown sugar
  • 3 eggs
  • 2 cups (give or take a 1/2 cup or so. I usually go over and it’s fine) mashed sweet potatoes or leftover sweet potatoes
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 3 cups flour
  • 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 teaspoons cinnamon
  • 1 teaspoon ground ginger
  • 1 teaspoon ground cloves
  • 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Grease and flour (I use Bakers Joy) a large 9 (or even a 10 if you have it) inch bread pan and about 3 muffin cups. Yes, 3… this makes too much batter for one loaf, not enough for 2 8 inch loaves so I usually get the 9 inch loaf and a few muffins from it. The muffins become mine because I’m the cook… I think of it as a mom tax 😀
  3. In a large bowl, combine the oil, sugars,  eggs, vanilla extract and sweet potatoes. Mix well.
  4. In a separate bowl, combine the dry ingredients. Dump them into the large bowl and using a wooden spoon or rubber spatula, combine just until mixed. Do NOT over beat.
  5. Pour/spoon into the loaf pan and muffin cups.
  6. Bake at 350 degrees until golden brown and until a skewer inserted in the center comes out with no crumbs on it. This will take about 20 minutes for the muffins and about 65 to 75 minutes for the loaf.
  7. Let cool in the pan for ten minutes, then turn out onto a wire rack to finish cooling. Try not to cut this until it is completely cool, cause it can be a bit gummy when warm due to the sweet potatoes. When cool however, it is just moist and tender.

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Annoyance, Thy Name Is Redundancy

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Chewy Chai Spiced Sugar Cookies

I think we all have our own little quirks as to what bugs us in how others write and/or speak, don’t we? One of mine (other than the misuse of different versions of ‘your” and “there”) is redundancy in writing. One of my biggest pet peeves there (you’ll notice that that says “there” and not “their” or they’re” 😛 ) is Chai Tea. Chai is another word for tea when used correctly (though yes, I know it usually refers to a specific spiced tea) so when people say they want Chai tea, they are saying they want tea tea hehe. Drives me batty. But then, I’m a picky pain the arse. What can I say?

I know one thing I do that drives others batty is my use of the ellipsis. I tend to overuse it, I admit. Strange writing affectation I have had for years.

Another thing that makes me cringe is when I hear people use computer slang out loud in “real” life. It seems to be more common among the younger crowd but I have heard it done by older people who should very definitely know better. Hearing someone say “LOL” to show they thought something was funny makes me want to tape their                               (or is that there? 😛 ) mouth shut. I’d only use a small piece of tape! Honest injun!

So what have I made for you today that brought on this rant? Why… Chai Spiced Sugar Cookies. The original recipe (from the McCormick site) just called them Chai Sugar Cookies but I changed it to Chai Spiced because the original title bugged me hehe. If there is not chai in it, then it shouldn’t be called chai and this uses only the spices normally found in chai, not the actual tea. I also hate when something is advertised as pumpkin flavored when in reality all it has is the typical pumpkin pie type spices in it. It’s misleading and it makes me cry when it ends up having no pumpkin flavor *sniffles in memory*

On topic, these are some pretty good sugar cookies. Pleasantly chewy if not baked too long with a nice spicy scent. The warm spices in these are perfect for this time of year and would make a great addition to a Christmas cookie tray. They also make a great addition to a cup of coffee or tea. I ate enough… I should know. The only thing I will do differently when I make these again would be to use more of each spice in them.

Chewy Chai Spiced Sugar Cookies

  • 2 3/4 cups flour
  • 2 teaspoons cream of tartar
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 3/4 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 3/4 teaspoon ground cardamom
  • 3/4 teaspoon ground cloves
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon white pepper
  • 1 cup unsalted butter, softened
  • 1 1/2 cups sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract (I used more like 2)
  • 1/4 sugar mixed with 1 teaspoon cinnamon and a couple of dashes of cardamom in a small bowl)
  1. Mix first 8 ingredients in a medium bowl. Set aside while you mix the wet ingredients.
  2. In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar until light and creamy. Beat in the eggs and the vanilla.
  3. Gradually add the flour mixture, using either low speed on your mixer (if you like cleaning up a fine flour coating from every surface in your kitchen) or a wooden spoon. Make sure it’s well mixed.
  4. Transfer to a smaller container ( a 4 cup measuring cup works well) and refrigerate for about 2 hours.
  5. Preheat your oven to 400. Shape the dough into small balls. Roll in the small bowl of sugar/cinnamon mixture. Place the balls 2 inches apart on an ungreased cookie sheet.
  6. Bake at 400 for about 6 to 8 minutes or until lightly browned. Cool on the cookie sheet for one minute then transfer to a wire rack to finish cooling. Well, those that you don’t eat as you pull them off the cookie sheet anyway.

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A Blogger By Any Other Name…

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…is NOT a good thing. The other day I went to a blog I go to frequently. I loved what I saw, made a comment and realized a few hours later when it popped into my mind, that I had called the lovely lady, a blogger I know (know as in blogs) by the wrong name. Needless to say, when I went back and looked, the comment I had made had NOT been approved. Lol… this aging thing sucks. In my defense I had been to about 40 gazillion blogs that day (t’was before I got sick and kind of disappeared), reading and buzzing and commenting and at that point, I’m surprised I remembered my own name, much less that of anyone else.

Anyone else find things like that happening as you age? And by as you age, I mean anyone over 25 hehe because God help me, I remember it happening back then too. I blame my kids. The memory loss and the fact that I haven’t had a full nights sleep or hot meal since 1985 are all the fault of my kids 😛 I’ve found though that It really does get worse as you get older. I can think to myself, while sitting here at the computer, “Oh, I need to look up such and such” and literally by the time I get Google pulled up to do a search, I’ve forgotten what I wanted to look up. Talk about wanting to slam my head into my desk! I frequently decide I’m just gonna give up trying to remember things and go adopt 36 cats, buy a pair of glasses that hangs by a string around my neck (though I just know I’ll still forget where they are), a case of Geritol and call myself the Crazy Old Cat Lady. It suits me… the crazy part anyway. Right now we only have 4 cats so that isn’t enough to qualify me. At least I think we have four cats. I can’t remember. Continue reading →

I Need C.P.R.

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That of course stands for Chocolate Public Relations cause this really needs some media attention! 😛

Ok, that was really corny but I couldn’t help myself.

If you’ve been a regular reader of my blog for a while, you may recall that up until last year, I had never eaten, much less cooked, a lava cake. It was one of those much hyped foods I avoided.

Then… I tried one. This one to be exact . And yeah, I admit it, I liked it. Just a little bit. Honest. I was still blase and ultra sophisticated, saying that I was so above all that… so not into the idea of a crispy edged cake with a center of soft gooey chocolate. Pshaw. You know how hip I am (I just lost “hip” status by using the word hip, didn’t I?) and too good for trendiness.

OK, OK, I LOVED IT!!!! *falls to the floor sobbing in abject “oh so not hip” shame*.

It was chocolate heaven on a plate. Crisp, yet gooey… chocolate yet in the case of that one, offset by fruit. So I decided a few days ago that I wanted more. I WAS going to make a white chocolate one but realized I had no white chocolate so that one will wait for now. I did however want something a LITTLE different than a plain one.

Well, I had a can (or six) of home made dulce de leche in the fridge ( I have to come clean and admit that I am one of those risk taking people who makes my dulce de leche by just boiling the unopened can for hours. What can I say? I like living life on the edge 😛 ) Moving on… I decided I was going to make a lava cake with a center of dulce de leche. Yeah I know; as if the cake in it’s normal form isn’t enough with it 35,000 calories and 4 bazillion fat grams, I added dulce de leche. If it makes you feel better, I have a black bean and polenta recipe coming up soon? Nice and healthy. Well, except for the cheese and cream in the polenta. Sigh. I give up.

It turned out quite nicely. Mind you, after eating all of the one I photographed, I may never eat again, but that’s ok. I can live off my own fat and the fat in the cake for at least a decade, maybe more.

So give this a try. It’s actually really easy. And darn, does it taste good! The chocolate lava cake part of this is from The Neeleys on Food Network. The only addition here that is me is the dulce de leche. On a side note, this recipe makes Paula Deen recipes look like they are for health nuts. On a side side note, are health nuts anything like Corn Nuts? Are they edible? On a side side side note, when did corn get nuts?

Ok, I’m stopping now. Continue reading →

Just Because I Love You…

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Browned Butter Chocolate Chip & Toffee Cookies

And you and you and you…and yeah, you too, even if you DO drink pepsi. 😀

Just because I love you all… well, maybe not you; you annoy me. But the rest of you are pretty darn cool. Soooo… as I was saying… just because I love you, I made cookies. Quite a few of them. And if you get a plane ticket, book a hotel room because if you stayed here you’d be clinically insane within three hours so that you can be all comfy, bring your own booze cause what I have would probably bore you and please make sure you have a Scrabble dictionary with you because I am going to force you to play Scrabble with me but no one can touch my Scrabble dictionary because it was my dads…. if you do all of this, I’ll feed you these utterly delicious cookies. I might even be persuaded to make some dinner for you and whip you up a cup of my famous hot chocolate. Continue reading →

“Just One More Box Hon!”

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I’ve talked about my dad in here before.  He died in 2006 from complications due to diabetes after having lived next door to me for about 8 years.He was an ornery cuss at times and did things I know he regretted because he apologized many times over for them but he was my best friend nonetheless.

He was generous to a fault and man did he love his food, especially sweets. That man could inhale some sweets! I mean, really. He would buy a six pack of ice cream bars and eat them in one night. Or on Halloween, he would buy a few gazillion bags of candy, ostensibly for the trick or treaters but I still laugh over how the kids got all the smarties or dum dum suckers and somehow, there just HAPPENED to be 14 bags of “the good stuff”, aka mini Snickers and the like, left for him to eat. As a diabetic, he shouldn’t have been eating it at all, but he had no willpower when it came to candy. He would give me that wonderful little boy giggle he had, smile and tell me he would only eat a little this time. My dad was a wonderful mix of a wise man and a young boy all tucked into a six foot tall sweets loving body.

One of the things he totally loved was cherry cordials. OMG, could he eat those like they were going to be going off market any second! He would buy a ton of them when they were on sale at Christmas (as well as 97 other times during the year) and when I would pretend to glare at him as he shoved boxes in his grocery cart, he would laugh and say, “just one more box hon!”

Dad would have loved these bars. He and Russ, my husband, would have been fighting over them because they are one of Russells favorites among the baked goods that I make. Speaking of inhaling… Russ is a diabetic also and is pretty good about not eating the bad things but when I make these, all control goes out the windows. So I don’t make them often. When I do though, I quietly smile over the mental image I get of dad and Russ sitting down together to talk with some coffee and a plate of these Cherry Cordial Bars. I wish they’d met.

This recipe originally comes from food.com. I have made some changes over the years but not many.

Chocolate Covered Cherry Bars

  • 3/4 cup unsalted butter, softened
  • 2 large eggs
  • 2/3 cup sugar
  • 1/4 cup light brown sugar, tightly packed
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 2 teaspoons almond extract
  • 2 cups all purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 can cherry pie filling
  • 1 bag Dove Dark Chocolate And Cherry Swirl candies, coarsely chopped (can use the dark chocolate and Raspberry ones too when the others aren’t out, but the flavor will be different)
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 13×9 inch pan.
  2. In a large bowl, combine the butter and sugar. Beat until fluffy.
  3. Add in the eggs and extracts.
  4. Combine the flour and baking soda together and mix into the bowl of wet ingredients. The mixture will be thick.
  5. Pour in the cherry pie filling and mix well.
  6. Fold in the candy pieces. Spread mixture in the prepared pan.
  7. Bake at 350 for about 25 minutes or until light brown and the top springs back when touched.
  8. Let cool and cut into squares.
  9. This is a very moist bar, pretty much a cross between a cake and a bar cookie.

You Got Your Chocolate In My Peanut Butter!

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Anybody else remember those extremely silly commercials from back in the day? You have one person walking somewhere with a jar of PB (like the person who posted the video asked, who walks around munching from a jar of peanut butter?) and another walking around with a chocolate bar. They crash, the foods collide and junk food magic is created, aka Reeses Cups.

 

 

I’ve mentioned before that I’m not a huge peanut butter fan. I would go hungry before eating peanut butter cookies (I can’t even handle the smell of them cooking lol), I tend to omit the peanuts or PB in any recipes needing it and I eat a PB&J sandwich maybe twice a year. I DO however like Reeses Cups (and cinnamon raisin peanut butter but that’s a different post). They may be peanut butter but the taste is different. So when I saw the following recipe here on Big Red Kitchen , I knew I had to try it. Especially since I knew that in my family, it would be a hit. One of my sons is about like me when it comes to PB but the rest of them like it and my daughter in law would kill someone to swipe this from them Love you Tiffy!) 😛 .

As for those I know in the blogger community, Erin ,
Peabody and Lindsey , this is for you ladies who if I remember correctly are peanut butter fans. I know I am remembering correctly that Peabody shares my love for a certain brands cinnamon raisin peanut butter 🙂

The rest of you, if you like peanut butter or Reeses Cups, give this a try. It tastes amazingly similar to a pb cup yet is more fun somehow with the big chunks (ok, that’s just cause I’m a pig) and homey look of it. This is exceedingly simple to make…and way too easy to eat. 😛 The only thing I really changed from the original recipe was to use chocolate chips instead of candy coating because I don’t care for the somewhat fake flavor of coating.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Bark

  • 2 1/2 pounds candy coating (or chocolate chips. (I used half milk chocolate, half semi sweet.
  • 1 pound peanut butter  (I used a full 18 ounce jar. I was NOT about to try and measure out a pound. I just used it all.)
  • 2 cups powdered sugar
  • 1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract
  1. Melt half the chocolate according to package directions.
  2. Spread it out to about 1/4 inch thickness on a lightly greased baking pan. The original called for parchment paper lined but over time (over 30 years of cooking. OMG, I’m freaking OLD!), I’ve learned what can go w/out the called for parchment and I  knew that since the chocolate would harden in the fridge and be able to be lifted off, it wouldn’t be needed.
  3. Set aside in the fridge.
  4. In a large bowl, combine the peanut butter, powdered sugar, butter and vanilla. Beat well. The mixture will be thick.
  5. Crumble this over the top of the first chocolate layer.
  6. Melt the remaining chocolate and pour it over the peanut butter layer. Spread it out making cutesy little swirls 😛
  7. Refrigerate this for at least a few hours or overnight until totally hardened.
  8. Break up in pieces.
  9. Store in the fridge.

Barking Up The RIGHT Tree

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I have a bone to pick with a few of you. Why you ask? Because if I get fat, it’s your fault. Yep; YOU and YOU and
YOU and
Even YOU .

All. Your. Fault.

You got me craving bark of some sort… any sort. If I could put the word bark in it, I’ve been craving it. Ok, maybe not tree bark. Or liver bark. Or a bark that’s worse than it’s bite. I don’t want anything that has the word worse in it. I’ll pass on all of those.

So what did I do today? I made two different kinds of bark. Chances are I will not be able to resist them because they are so damn good and I will need to get more fat girl pants.

And it’s your fault.

Aren’t you ashamed?

So, since I know you’re horribly ashamed of yourself, you need to make one or both of these and get fat with me. Then we can go out shopping together for fat girl pants and maybe stop and get some mall food. We all know how healthy THAT is.

Lemon Vanilla Bean Bark

I made this one because I absolutely LOVE anything lemon. My kids will be lucky to get any of this kind.

  • 2 bags (11 to 12 ounces) white chocolate chips
  • 1 vanilla bean
  • 1 bag Brachs Lemon Drops, crushed (put them in a ziploc bag and go at them with a meat tenderizer or a hammer)
  • 1 tablespoon solid shortening
  • 1 teaspoon lemon extract or 1/4 teaspoon lemon oil
  1. Slice your vanilla bean in half and scrape out the seeds (don’t throw out the bean. Put it in your sugar bowl and in a few days, you’ll have delicious vanilla sugar) and put them in a large bowl with the white chocolate chips.
  2. Melt the chips and the shortening in the microwave. Use one minute increments, stirring after each one, until the chocolate is melted and liquidy. Don’t over cook it or you’ll end up with a hard lump. Believe me; I’ve done that many times in the past. It’s extremely annoying to put it mildly.
  3. Working quickly, stir the crushed lemon drops and the lemon extract into the chocolate
  4. Plop the mixture onto a foil lined, parchment lined or VERY lightly greased baking sheet and spread it out.
  5. Put in a cold place (I put mine on my front porch) until it is hard. Break it into pieces and eat enough to need fat girl pants. If there is any left, store it in a cool place (front porches work great) in a ziploc type bag.

Rum Raisin Bark

I made THIS one because my favorite candy bar is one I can not find ANYWHERE *sobs*. It is a German one that I got addicted to when I lived in Germany. Many of you probably know of Ritter Sport bars. They can be found at a lot of large grocery stores. The problem is that they don’t seem to ever have the Rum, Trauben, Nuss one and I love it. It is a rum raisin chocolate with nuts. I omitted the nuts because I just wasn’t in the mood but you could probably add about 1/2 cup of chopped hazelnuts to this.

  • 1 12 ounce bag milk chocolate chips
  • 1 12 ounce bag semi sweet chocolate chips
  • 3 tablespoons solid shortening
  • 1 cup raisins
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons rum extract
  1. In a large bowl, melt your chips and shortening in the microwave. Melt at one minute increments, stirring after each minute, until the chocolate is melted.
  2. Working quickly stir in the raisins and the rum extract.
  3. Spread on a foil lined, parchment lined or lightly greased baking sheet.
  4. Put in a cool place to harden then break into pieces.
  5. Eat a lot. Go get those fat girl pants. Sob. Eat more for comfort and get involved in a vicious cycle that only a woman could do.